Simple Blessings

Early this evening, I was standing at the kitchen sinking washing some of the utensils I was using to prep dinner, staring absentmindedly out the window, thinking about what a beautiful Spring day it had been.  I looked out at the edge of the pool, and saw two of our cats – Blueberry and Patches – lounging lazily.  My oldest cat, Mai Tai, came bounding through the pet door, nearly tripping over my husband’s flip flops, and I burst into laughter at the sight of his startled face, and Patches’ concerned glance.  I then immediately stopped scrubbing, and said a small prayer of thanks for the blessings I was surrounded with.

I’d spent an hour or so chopping veggies for dinner (Cajun chicken pasta), singing along to Van Morrison, sipping on one of my favorite red wines, and enjoying the endless sunlight, thanks to the time change.  It was the type of lazy Saturday afternoon that rarely comes, but is much appreciated when it arrives.  I knew any minute, my husband would come walking through the door from work, and we’d get to enjoy a super yummy meal and each other’s company.

It was in that moment, my pause in scrubbing, that I felt the strong desire to thank God for that day, and the joy I’d felt in so many simple tasks: folding fresh laundry, sweeping up fallen blossoms from our three hanging Scarlett Begonias (which are still alive!), reading an old Stephen King book for a few hours.  I was happy to chop fresh veggies, and thankful I had them for our supper.  I was filled with laughter at the sight of our four cats running around like mad, chasing each other, lizards, and even our dog Maggie Mae, all over the back yard.  And I was at peace, watching the sky slowly turn to pink.

Sometimes I get so caught up in thanking God for the big things He does for us, that I can completely neglect thanking him for the small things I am blessed to have each and every day.  But when I stop and really focus on all the things I have to be thankful for…well, the list is seemingly endless. 

Today, I found joy in simple tasks.  I felt appreciation for the world we’ve been given, right down to the grasshopper that Frankie brought inside the house.  And my heart was filled to the brim with the love God has for us, and the realization of just how much He’d given us.

While I was surprised at the overwhelming happiness I felt, it was a wonderful reminder that I should be focusing on these “small” blessings each and every day.  God does bless us with big, incredible, amazing gifts…but there are plenty of simple things out there to tell Him thanks for as well.

You Shall Overcome

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding." - Proverbs 3:5

I have heard it said many times after someone has endured a difficult time in life that those challenges are, “what made them today.”  This is a statement that I wholeheartedly believe.  It is absolutely true, at least in my book, that overcoming obstacles, facing tragedy, withstanding trials, are things that will shape and mold us into people who are not only stronger in the face of adversity, but stronger in our faith.

But, as I’ve journeyed through life, I’ve found something else to be entirely true…that sometimes our circumstances arise by choice, and not by fate.  And sometimes those circumstances didn’t necessarily help you to become who you are…they’ve actually delayed you from becoming the person God intended you to be.

A while back, I briefly wrote about the car accident I was involved in, and how I came to the understanding that God truly had a plan for me.  And although I did express the anger I initially felt towards God for seemingly derailing the plan that I had for my life, what I failed to include was how far from God I allowed my own choices to take me.

Dealing with such a heavy blow did leave me angry and confused, not understanding why things didn’t just “fall into place” the way I’d had my heart set on.  Because I carried this anger and hurt, I found myself in a dark place.  For a brief while, I found myself making choices that today, as an adult, terrify me.  I fell in with the wrong crowd, and I let those people bring me down.  I had total disregard for how my actions and words may hurt my family, my friends, and myself.  I didn’t care if anyone worried about me; I was going to do what I wanted to, no matter what.  And while I felt happy (or the illusion of happiness) most of the time, when I was alone, I felt emptiness.  I’d spent all this time filling the void with the world, and I’d left no room for God.  Once I realized that the pain and hurt remained, I began to understand that the void I was feeling was the result of my poor choices…and I knew that I had to regain the personal relationship with God that I’d so carelessly tossed aside.

For a long time, a carried a fair amount of guilt and shame for some of those choices I’d made.  I had a difficult time believing God still loved and forgave me after what I’d put Him through.  And I felt an incredible sadness when I thought about the amount of time I’d missed spending with God because I’d had my own agenda.  He wanted better for me. 

Things happen that are out of our control…the death of a loved one, the loss of a friendship, a tragic accident, mental or physical abuse, addictions…and we can all relate in some way to many of these situations.  As Christians, we’re here to love and support each other during these times.  Sometimes we let these unforeseeable and uncontrollable circumstances get the best of us; we cope on our own, only to find that these choices lead us into another place of despair and anguish.

It isn’t God’s will to see you in pain, to cause suffering or hurt.  When we find ourselves in those dark moments, where turning to the world for relief instead of turning to God seems like the best option…stop.  Remember how much He loves and cares for you, that He has always been right by your side, and that He’s made sacrifices and suffered through difficult times (Jesus, anyone?) just as we are.  But it does get better, and you will overcome.  Keep God first and foremost, and lean on your Christian family…and everything else will (eventually) fall into place.  We are strong when we lean on God.

There are still moments where even now, ten years later, I’ll feel a twinge of anxiety…but those days are few and far between.  I have finally understood that with God, we really can overcome anything…from severe tragedy to our own simple, stupid mistakes.

And maybe things won’t turn out the way you’d hoped or planned…but just remember, God’s plan for your life is so much more than you could have imagined.

Giving Grace

"Let us consider how to spur one another on toward love and good deeds." - Hebrews 10:24

Today was one of those days.  Having a career in insurance guarantees that, out of all your working days during the year, a handful of them are going to be difficult.  Any agent will tell you, especially now, that insurance is one of those things folks are no longer considering to be protection or peace of mind, but rather a “necessary evil.”  Rates are going up, carriers are nonrenewing, and the State of Florida has no idea what to do about any of it a fair amount of the time…and we aren’t even in hurricane season yet.

Some clients have quite the penchant for getting under my skin…they complain, yell, swear, belittle and berate for what seems like an endless five minutes, hardly allowing you to get an word in edgewise (even though, last time I checked, I’m the one with the license – not them).  Difficult might not even be strong enough an adjective for some of these folks…

So, what I’ve challenged myself to do for quite some time now is to suck it up, show the love, and pray for my clients.

Why?  Well, first of all, because God commanded us to.  But secondly, it’s because I’ve realized that I’m not sure what they have going on at the other end of that phone line,.  They could be suffering from a terminal illness, going through a difficult divorce, losing their home, or getting ready to face the “empty nest” as their last child prepares to head off for college.  They could also be really upset with their Sweet Sixteen bracket.  Regardless, they sound like they could use someone on their side today, and I need to give them a little grace.

Since I’ve started praying for clients, I have found that more often than not, things will fall into place.  Oh sure, there’s always those few who will never be satisfied and will always be difficult, and I’ve learned to accept that and laugh it off (when I can).  But for the most part, extending the olive branch, or silently giving them the grace they may need, has made the day so much better, both for me and them.

If I think about my day, a full 24 hours, I could say I run into a lot of jerks.  And while many are strangers (like bad drivers on Del Prado trying to squeeze into the Dunkin’ Donuts parking lot) some of my “jerks” are folks I’m close with.  Co-workers, associates, clients, friends, even family.  But now, instead of wasting energy to criticize and condemn, I’m trying to redirect that, and focus on prayer instead, because the same “client theory” holds true – we don’t always know what our loved ones are going through.

So just because a co-worker snapped at you this morning, or a close friend hasn’t returned your last four calls, or your aunt let it slip that she liked your hair better before you cut it, doesn’t mean they are undeserving of love, grace and compassion.  And if you can’t find the words to express that to them directly, let God know.

Taking just a few minutes to talk with God and ask Him to help someone out with their struggles, to take whatever is burdening them and lighten the load, or just to fill their heart and mind with the hope and joy that can be found in Him, can be just the thing someone needs.  And…you can accomplish this without even having to hear about forgetting to change the coffee filter, taking out the trash, or calling your sister on her birthday!

Truth is, you could be Jesus in the flesh for someone today, whether you realize it or not.  And we could all use a little prayer. J

Placing Importance on What's Important

Jesus replied, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind." This is the first and greatest commandment. - Matthew 22:37-38

In the winter of 2005, not too long after Evan and I were married, we began one of the most exciting times in a young couple’s life together…looking for our own house. We had been renting in the Cape, and really loved the area, and decided it was time to put our roots down.

I spent hours scouring the MLS listings and real estate websites; we did many a “drive by” all over town, until we finally found something we really loved…and it was perfect! The house had three bedrooms and two bathrooms, a two car garage, a large fenced backyard, and a beautiful swimming pool. The lanai even had a pet door. It was as if the house was practically begging us to move in. And, the house was only one block away from our church...so this surely had to be a God thing! I was filled with hope, optimism, and visions of curtains and color swatches dancing in my head.

We began working with David, our mortgage broker, and he crunched the numbers. At such a young age, I was unfamiliar with the process of getting pre-approved for a loan; I just assumed you didn’t buy the diamond until afteryou knew you were in love, right?

At first David thought it would be nearly impossible to finance what we wanted…we had little to put down, and had only been living in the area a couple years – our careers weren’t exactly what banks considered to be established. Finally, after almost a week, he came back to us with what we’d needed before our search even began – APPROVAL! But, there was a catch…in order to finance the house, he’d need to do some “creative” things with the loan. Those creative things, which would allow us to buy the house, would also make our mortgage payment over $2,400! Nearly double our rent payment!

Could we afford it? Barely. It was doable, if we cut out some other luxuries (you know, like bread and eggs). Was it the best decision? Well, obviously not. Evan, who is quite the optimist, but also a great realist, managed to get my head out of the clouds. After many agonizing days and nights of running the budget numbers, thinking of ways to save, even considering adding part-time jobs to our already busy lives, we agreed that this was not, in fact, the house of our dreams.

To be honest, I was devastated. I felt that we’d worked hard, and deserved a home of our own to really begin our lives in. I couldn’t understand why God would burst my bubble. I spent many days after “losing”the house in quite a funk; sometimes crying, sometimes yelling, but most of the time I was simply confused.

After some time, I realized that I had put so much time and energy on getting this particular house, that I’d completely lost sight of what was truly important. We had a roof over our heads; we had food in the refrigerator, careers that paid the bills, and a happy life. Buying this house was not really that important, in hindsight. God had already blessed us tremendously, and here I was, complaining about not having more. This was the reality check I needed to understand that God was priority one in my life, not finding a house.

I’ve heard it said that, “He who dies with the most toys, wins”…but I’ve also heard that he who dies with the most toys does just that – dies. There is no great reward for accumulating “stuff.” God doesn’t really care if your house is 1,200 square feet, or 12,000 square feet. And while it’s nice to have new things, to take vacations, to splurge every once in a while, we shouldn’t let the things that we don’t have become the “ones that got away” in our minds. God provides for us; he give us exactly what we need, at exactly the right time. We just don’t always realize it. He wants you to be happy, and He wants to bless you, but He also wants you to keep Him first in your life and give thanks for what you do have. His timing, and His gifts, are always perfect.

So, what about His perfect timing in blessings? Well, a little over a year later, at a time when we weren’t even looking for a house, I came across a listing in one of those real estate magazines Publix has on display in their lobby. And wouldn’t you know…I found “the one.” It was three bedrooms, two baths, a one car garage, large fenced yard, a beautiful pool…and a pet door on the lanai.

I was extremely hesitant about beginning the process again, but this time, we did it right. And that all-important first step? No, not pre-approval on the loan…pre-approval from the Big Guy. We spent a few days praying, asking for His guidance, and felt that this was the right time. We put in an offer, which was accepted within days. Obtaining a loan was a breeze –and not $2,400 a month! Five years later, I still thank God each and every day for blessing us with this home, and the roots we’ve begun. He made it happen.

Prayer Pause

"Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all cirucumstances...for this is God's will through Christ Jesus." - 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

When Evan and I first moved to Cape Coral years ago, we rented a little house in a small neighborhood not too far from where we live today.  At the time, I was still based in our agency’s corporate office in Fort Myers.  Traveling across the bridge every morning proved to be a challenge, especially if I didn’t leave by 7:15am.  Sitting through the light at Del Prado and the Parkway two or three times was almost a given if I had fallen jut ten precious minutes behind schedule.

We had grown close with nearly all our neighbors not long after moving in (save for a few Yankees that I could never quite see eye to eye with).  One of our neighbors was a sweet old man, who split his time between bagging groceries at Publix, and volunteering at the Salvation Army’s thrift store just down the street.  He was quiet, kept to himself mostly, and always walked to work.  He was the type who would smile and wave when you passed, but not really stop to converse.  Because our house was so near the entrance to the neighborhood, we did see him nearly every day.

One morning, during season, I found myself running late for work – again.  After rushing around the house to quickly feed the cats, walk Maggie Mae (who was just a puppy at the time), turn on the dishwasher, and find my shoes, I grabbed my bag and bolted for the door.  I hurled my belongings into the back seat of our truck, hopped into the driver’s seat (uttering many four letter words at the time) cranked the engine and threw that sucker into reverse, ready to barrel down the driveway and into rush hour traffic.  This was not how I’d envisioned my day starting…my head was full of mean thoughts, anticipating the awful drive in and the disapproving looks from my supervisor, who would most certainly be waiting at my cubicle.  I also knew that starting my day on such a sour note would surely keep me on this negative path.  The day hadn’t even begun, and I was already thinking of crawling back in bed.

Halfway down the driveway, I was forced to slam on brakes, as our quiet and kind (and extremely slow) neighbor was making his way down the street, headed to the thrift store for his day of volunteering.  I glared at him in the rear view mirror, and continued spouting out a few more choice words.  Of all mornings, this is the one he decides to walk on MY side of the street?!

He made it to the center of our driveway, and stopped.  Then, he bowed his head, and brought his folded hands to his face…and he prayed.  His prayer lasted ten or fifteen seconds at best.  He concluded, made the sign of the cross, and continued on his way, never turning his head in my direction.

Witnessing this small act felt like a sucker punch to the gut.  Why was I in such a hurry?  Why was I placing so much importance on such menial things?  Turning into Speed Racer wasn’t going to clear the traffic; swearing at the coffee pot wasn’t going to make my day any easier.  What was the point of getting so upset over such silly things, completely beyond my control?

I’ll never know what my old neighbor stopped to pray for.  Maybe he saw my frantic face, and thought I could use some extra prayers that day.  Maybe he feared for his life when he saw me spin the tires just backing out of the driveway.  Or maybe he was just stopping to thank God for the beautiful day.  Either way, his small act changed my entire direction that day.

I was reminded that in all circumstances, good or bad, I need to take the time to be with God, to talk to Him, and thank Him for all He’s given me.  And this isn’t just in the major good and bad times…we’re talking every day.  Thanking him for BOGO Ranch dressing, for a day where the humidity never even comes close to reaching 100%, for a few quiet minutes alone…and even for the blessing of a career that may require getting up a little bit earlier in the morning to make it on time. 

In every situation, God is with you; right beside you, holding your hand, steering you in the right direction – if we just stop to pay attention.  Take a prayer pause in your busy day and have a chat with the Big Guy; thank him for your blessings, in all circumstances.